Fair weather friend or storm chaser: What is your response when a friend’s life gets difficult?
“It’s during the worst storms of your life that you will get to see the true colors of the people who say they care for you”. Author Unknown
Have you ever been outside and watched a storm roll in from the distance? Sometimes it can beautiful, at first, as the sky changes colors, the temperature cools down, and a wind will swirls around you. Ultimately, the full force of the storm will show up – grayish black skies, temperatures become stifled, winds, rain, hail or sleet will began pummeling anything and everything in its path.
Like a weather storm, life storms often show up the same way. Hop scotching its way across the landscape. The storm may hit your life or it may hit a co-worker, a friend, a relative, or a neighbor.
Sometimes the storm is unpredictable. Other times, you’ll see the signs of the storm coming in the distance, but you can’t do anything about it. You know the storm is headed straight for you or a friend. There is no shelter to run into for safety. The storm must be faced head on.
The storm may come in the form of a job loss, a divorce, loss of a spouse or child, an unexpected doctor’s report, a betrayal, public embarrassment or an estrangement. Like storms, life’s problems are not intended for a select group of people. The storm will roll in on the rich and poor, old and young, single and married—no one is exempt.
Fair weather friend
If you see your friend headed into a storm, what is your response? Are you a fair weathered friend, one who stops being a friend during difficult times? For some people, they run the opposite way. Fear grips their heart as the storm grips their friend’s life. Others pretend they don’t see the storm. They never ask their friend how they are doing or what they can do to help. Perhaps the saddest response is the “judgmental response”—looking down on those who suffer while feeling justified in their unwillingness to help. But there’s a better response…one that each of us can rise to.
Healing response
If your friend is headed into a menacing storm, there is only one right response: Gear up and face the storm together. Don’t turn a blind eye. Instead, look them straight in the eye and say, “I am here for you and I see you.” Don’t leave them fallen, broken, or alone. You pick them up and let them know you will help carry them through. Don’t leave them lost. You take them by the arm and help lead them to safety. Don’t leave them wounded. You speak words of healing and life that nurture their hurting spirit. Don’t let them give up. You remind them that God can turn the storm into beauty. Romans 8:28 reminds us,
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
That is a healing response! This is who we are called to be. We are the hands and feet of Jesus here on earth. We are not called to run. We are called into the storm, equipped, prepared, and led by the One who speaks to the storm! (Mark 4:35-41)
