Celebrate You & Me!
I grew up in a family that was big on celebrations. It did not matter if we had a little or a lot, we were celebrated on birthday and holidays. I love the past memories and the traditions we have grown to cherish.
I know, however, that for many people celebrating can feel dreadful and obligatory. Rather than being full of festivity, it’s full of painful emotion and inconvenience. I have heard lots of reasons for choices not to celebrate:
“We’ve been married too long for that nonsense.” “They know I love them.” “It’s all about commercialism.” “They won’t appreciate my work.” “I can’t afford to celebrate.” “We celebrate after the holidays for the discounts.” “I don’t want to spoil them.” “I forgot.” “I was never celebrated.”
Why is this important?
Because we—you and me—are important.
Celebrating is an act of love for one another. It prevents you from becoming an inward focus individual. It lets those around you know they matter. Celebrating says, “You are beautiful to me.” If you tend to struggle with jealousy, celebrating another person is a perfect antidote for this type of insecurity.
So, How do you learn to celebrate?
First, remember the important dates. It really is simple. Make it a priority to keep dates on your calendar. Forgetting anniversaries, birthdays, and important milestones is unacceptable. Everybody makes mistakes, but after the first time, you shouldn’t make this mistake again. Also, try to celebrate on the special day if possible.
Second, observe the people in your life. What love language do they speak? If they enjoy words, then write a love letter to your friend. If they need time with you, spend an afternoon laughing together. If you don’t know your own love language, read Gary Chapman’s book, The 5 Love Languages. You can also access a free love language profile assessment. This is a great place for any person/couple to start building new memories.
Third, acknowledge accomplishments. When my husband and I were in graduate school, we would celebrate at the end of each semester. It was quite simple—we went to our favorite pizza place, toasted the end of the semester, and dreamed about the next to come. This was such a fun memory, and it spoke to each other “I see your accomplishment and I am so proud of you.”
Finally, don’t forget the “thank you.” If you do find yourself as the recipient of a love celebration, say “thank you”… and why you are thankful. This is such an important part of the giving equation that many people struggle to voice.
Healthy people learn to build “together” memories.
You don’t want to end life with two separate stories that rarely intersected. If hurtful memories are the reason for your resistance to celebrate, please know this: healing is available. Do not let hurt control how you love, and don’t give it that type of power in your life. Making merry for others is healing!
Romans 12:10-11 says, “Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically” (NLT).
Some unique ways to say “you are important to me”:
http://deannacochranjewelry.com/shop/ Wear a story jewelry. This designer makes beautiful custom engraved pieces of jewelry.
https://www.etsy.com/shop/RameWorks?section_id=16938837 Personalized metal wallet insert cards.
www.jamesavery.com They make something unique for every type of holiday or occasion.
http://www.waxingpoetic.com Beautiful jewelry that tells a story.